Lets face it, the film industry has never been good at originality, but these days it seems that an almost terrifying amount of sequels, series and rip-offs are being made. But even still, there are those select films and series that seem to rise to the cream of the crap. These are the films that continue to be made, regardless of the fact that there are too many or they're just plain horrible. Here are some that just need to stop.
1. Movies about men dressing up as fat women
Worst offenders (big mama's house, Norbit, Every Madea movie ever)
Its hard to believe that cross dressing as a morbidly obese woman has become almost common in normal theaters. It sounds like some kind of awkward fetish. I mean, at first, it just seemed like a horrifying little experiment dreamed up by the remake of The Nutty Professor, but over the past decade we've seen no less than 2 other major actors rip this idea off. There's been two nutty professor movies (Eddy murphy plays a whole family of horribly fat cretins), 3 big momma movies, and God knows how many Madea movies Tyler Perry's made. Whats horrible is that all of these movies seem to hinge on one single joke that we're suppose to keep laughing at. I get it, its not a fat sassy lady, its a dude. Honestly, it just screams desperation from the actors portraying them. Nothing says "I've completely lost my pride and dignity" like cross dressing for millions of Americans for a full length major motion film.
2. Super Hero Movies
(X-men: first class, Thor, Spider man re re remake, super man re re re make, Batman re re remake)
Don't get me wrong, I love super heroes. The batman shirt I'm wearing can attest to that. But stop making them so damn fast Hollywood. I get it Hollywood, we're in a recession and you need to make movies that you think will make money. Also, I know that Sam Rami didn't do the best job with the Spider man movies and that the new Superman movie wasn't the best variation of the son from kripton, but that doesn't give you a reason to remake them all...now...at once. Why am I bitching about this? Well, because like it or not America's getting a tidal wave of new super hero movies. Lets take a run down of whats coming out soon, shall we.
Thor, X-men remake, Spiderman remake, Batman remake, Superman remake, The Avengers, The Green Lantern, Ant man (seriously?), Captain America, Conan remake, Deadpool, Ghost Rider, Iron Man, Kick Ass, Red Sonja, Another Wolverine movie (because the last one was so good)
holy crap! Keep in mind that most of this list has already been made (or remade) before. How the hell do you expect us to keep caring about all this Hollywood?
3. A Christmas Carol
Offenders (all of them, every single damn one)
Ok, so I know its not Christmas, but I'm trying to put a stop to another one of these things being made. Almost every Christmas, someone dreams up another incantation of Dicken's classic. Don't believe me? ok, fine, heres the list of all the years that A Christmas Carol has been made (thanks to IMDB):
A Christmas Carol (1908)
A Christmas Carol (1910)
A Christmas Carol (1914)
A Christmas Carol (1938)
A Christmas Carol (1943) (TV)
A Christmas Carol (1947) (TV)
The Christmas Carol (1949) (TV)
A Christmas Carol (1950) (TV)
A Christmas Carol (1951)
A Christmas Carol (1969) (TV)
A Christmas Carol (1971) (TV)
A Christmas Carol (1977) (TV)
A Christmas Carol (1981) (TV)
A Christmas Carol (1982/I) (TV)
A Christmas Carol (1984) (TV)
A Christmas Carol (1994) (V)
A Christmas Carol (1997)
A Christmas Carol (1999) (TV)
A Christmas Carol (2000) (TV)
A Christmas Carol (2004) (V)
A Christmas Carol (2009)
And thats not to mention all the spin off and Holiday Specials as well:
Mister Magoo's Christmas Carol (1962)
Ebenezer Scrooge (Scrooge) (1970)
Skinflint: A Country Christmas Carol (1979) (TV)
A Christmas Carol at Ford's Theatre (1979) (TV)
Bugs Bunny's Christmas Carol (1979) (TV)
Mickey's Christmas Carol (1983)
Blackadder's Christmas Carol (1988) (TV)
Scrooged (1988)
Scrooge: A Christmas Carol (1989) (TV)
The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992)
A Flintstones Christmas Carol (1994) (TV)
Bah, Humbug!: The Story of Charles Dickens' 'A Christmas Carol' (1994) (TV)
An All Dogs Christmas Carol (1998) (V)
A Diva's Christmas Carol (2000) (TV)
A Carol Christmas (2003) (TV)
A Christmas Carol: The Musical (2004) (TV)
A Carol of Christmas (2005)
A Sesame Street Christmas Carol (2006) (V)
Barbie in 'A Christmas Carol' (2008) (V)
Dora's Christmas Carol Adventure (2009) (TV)
A Christmas Carol: Capturing a Christmas Carol (2010)
See?
Whats even worse is the high caliber of people making them. From directors Robert Zemeckis to Frank Oz and the high profile actors like Patrick Stuart, Jim Carry and Michael Cain.
Movie makers, realizing that you've got a problem is the first step. You need to stop this horrible addiction.
